Pedicini v. the People: time for Polk clients to dump their litigious, puppet-loathing sore loser
What if a mythical Manatee County puppet creature destroyed your rep as a political mastermind with satirical animated rap videos that include probably NSFW gerbil references? Would you sue?
The loser political consultant Anthony Pedicini has now served notice on the people of Polk County, where the core of his deteriorating stable of clients dwells: if you run an aggressive campaign against one of Pedicini’s clients or publicly criticize them, the candidate and Pedicini will sue you.
That’s what former Manatee County Commissioner Kevin Van Ostenbridge and Pedicini are now doing in Manatee County, where voters humiliated them both in the August 2024 GOP primary.
Van Ostenbridge and Pedicini are seeking to punish their citizens by punishing a local PAC that produced videos that “maintain a consistent theme, painting Mr. Van Ostenbridge and Mr. Pedicini as corrupt public figures, and insinuating that they and others engaged in obscene sexual acts.”
This, of course, more or less describes every campaign Anthony Pedicini himself has ever run. Ask Polk School Board Member Lisa Miller, who also whipped him and his friends.
Lawfare
The language of the lawsuit focuses on more than the mean corruption and sex things said about Van Ostenbridge and Pedicini as candidate and consultant. It also accuses the citizens of illegally using their likenesses commercially as part of the campaign and demands compensation related to social media somehow. It’s pretty muddled and non-specific. I’ll post it at the end of the article.
In short, this suit is meant to intimidate citizens, not purify electioneering practices.
If you can’t win competitive campaigns, which Pedicini cannot anymore, roll the dice that corrupt courts will call your opponents illegal — or that the specter of that will prevent opponents from ever materializing. That’s the point of this suit.
Marc Masferrer of the Bradenton Journal has the Manatee details.
Pedicini’s clients in Polk — Jennifer Canady, Jennifer Kincart, Josie Tomkow (more or less his work sister-in-law through the SIMWINs firm) should disavow Pedicini’s cheap lawfare and replace him with some other sleazy hack. But we’ve already seen that Canady will sick a two-day Grady Judd manhunt on a political opponent who tossed a balled up pair of panties vaguely in her direction. So I won’t hold my breath.
In fact, I suspect folks around here are more likely to emulate than disavow Pedicini’s lawfare.
I regularly, accurately “portray” multiple public figures as “corrupt,” as I define it, simply by accurately describing their behavior. Pedicini is certainly one of them. So I’m sure my day is coming as a defendant to some butthurt MAGA Fluid acting on the Pedicini principle. Courts should laugh at it; but I don’t have any faith in the honor of Florida state courts.
So I guess that’s the glass half-ominous view of Pedicini-vs-the-People.
The monster at the end of Pedicini’s book
Now, here’s the glass-fully-hilarious view.
This somewhat ribald satirical puppet and/or mythical fantasy creature goes by the name Kevin-Kyle Kaczynski-Von Oswald the XVII, aka “The Real KVO.” He is, more or less, the defendant in Pedicini vs. the People.
The Real KVO starred in a series of wild, anti-incumbent Manatee commissioner videos. You can access them at the Real KVO website here. I cannot begin to explain all the local dynamics and inside jokes contained within this series. Somehow #ramen emerged a rallying cry. ¯\_(ツ)_/¯
The Real KVO became the symbol of a sort of lib + MAGA local alliance that trounced developer-owned, fake MAGA county commissioners in Manatee, who were all repped by Pedicini.
“Anthony Pepperoncini,” satirical doppelganger of the trash-talking real consultant of the powers-that-be in Manatee, found himself a regular target of the Real KVO crew.
The real KVO also began showing up in person in real life. As you can see, he gives off strong, oversized Grover vibes.
You might even say real KVO was the monster at the end of Pedicini’s book.
As cute as Real KVO is, these aren’t Sesame Street cartoons. They’re for adult audiences. This “Pepperonchini”-focused animated rap video, which has a really catchy hook, gives you the vibe. It isn’t exactly “Mr. Smith Goes to Washington.”
Refrain:
Anthony Pepperonchini, you tiptoe on lies;
in a world of big politics your fur never dries;
with your beady little eyes your making who’s [or “news”], right?
but we know gerbil king you just ain’t that bright
We’ll come back to “gerbil king” (yes, I’m sorry, but we will) in a second.
“If you take things personally…”
But first, this is also hilarious.
In happier times, Anthony Pedicini graced the cover of Peter Schorsch’s Influence Magazine, the yearbook of the degenerate high school that is Florida’s lobbying/grifting state government hanger-on class. He talked a lot of shit.
This is the pull quote from the warmly caressing “profile” of this rugged outdoorsman:
Full passage here:
Pedicini doesn’t suffer many scruples for the work for the work he’s done, even if it brings him plenty of disdain and grief.
“I don’t know, I get frustrated when you have politicians who just don’t want to admit that what you’re putting out is true,” he said. “If you voted on something and I put on a mailer on behalf of my client that you raised taxes, don’t get all mad that we put it on a flier. I didn’t vote for it. I guess that’s the toughest part, right? When you run a race, you put everything out there on a person. The other team wants everything our there on you as a person.
“If you take things personally, you probably shouldn’t run for office, because none of it is personal, it really is just politics. And if it’s true, it’s fair. If you voted for that tax, it’s fair. If you didn’t pay your child support or you filed for bankruptcy, you probably need to think about not running. If you have a divorce file that’s 30 feet thick, the public sphere is probably not for you.”
Pedicini is the classic example of brittle broflake who can dish it out, but not take it.
“Insinuating that they and others engaged in obscene sexual acts.”
Pedicini and Van Ostenbridge do not specify in their lawsuit any example of supposed insinuation of obscene sex acts. I, personally, can only find one example of something one might consider an “obscene sex act” as Pedicini and Van Ostenbridge put it. Here it is:
Two thoughts here about this and other gerbil-adjacent humor in the KVO videos:
Yes, those of us who are GenXers are likely scarred by gerbil-related urban legends involving famous people that we heard as youngsters. But gerbils are nimble, clever creatures. That fake TV crawl says nothing about sex. It could just be a really unlucky cartoon injury. You would probably have to do some googling — which I strongly advise against — to find any potential, specific intersection of gerbil and sex act.
If this is a reference to an “obscene sex act,” it is a million percent consistent with the outlandish sexual satire that the U.S. Supreme Court found completely legal in the Jerry Falwell v. Larry Flynt case. Now, no precedent is safe from the rapacious Roberts Court. But this one was unanimous.
Beyond gerbils, in this video …
... the Real KVO crew “accuses” Pedicini and Van Ostenbridge of holding hands. That’s hardly an obscene sex act. It “accuses” Pedicini of enjoying a Pride rally. That’s hardly an obscene sex act.
Clearly, the Real KVO producers are trying to imply and/or openly state that Pedicini is gay — but, again, being gay is not an obscene sex act.
I am not the type of Republican who wakes up thinking about other people’s genitals — and where they put them — or other people’s sexuality. I have no idea if Anthony Pedicini is gay. I don’t care.
But most MAGAs seem to; and lot of Republicans overall do.
Pedicini himself is all too happy to trash/exploit the sexual identity other people for money and power. His failed campaign against Democrat Allison Tant was all about Allison not hating trans people enough, which was also one the main presidential election storylines.
So it will be fascinating to see which specific “obscene sex act” allegation Pedicini and Van Ostenbridge want more than $50,000 in punitive damages for. It will also be fascinating to see how eager they are for discovery:
Remember Anthony:
When you run a race, you put everything out there on a person. The other team wants everything our there on you as a person.
Anyway, here is the suit. Happy New Year.
Great piece! As I'm sure you know, Pedicini takes Developer's cash to create PACs with names like "The Committee to expose fake Republicans." He puts out "voter guides" designed to mislead voters by appearing to be official or endorsed by Trump. Pedicini uses the lowest, most dishonorable tactics. He goes after family members of candidates. I hope the 3 remaining Commissioners (their seats were not up in 2024) continue to use Pedicini. We need to clean house and get rid of the worst kind of dishonest, immoral politics that he represents. His lawsuit should be dismissed as a waste of the court's time.
Pepperoni giving a bad name to innocuous gerbils.